Because I have severe commitment issues.
There are parts of myself that I can’t begin to comprehend why they exist in the first place. These are parts I want to bury beneath the abyss so deep that I can finally pretend, at the very least, that their presence is just a byproduct of a clash of undefined emotions. They are not real.
It is at hours like these I find myself incessantly wallowing in the past, hoping I can salvage any shred of my being I left there a long time ago. A thirst for familiarity. A hunger for belonging. The irony begins when being lost starts feeling like a place I belong.
I can’t sleep. I’ve been unable to sleep.
"The mouse looks like its fueling the rocket with his semen. Just look at his face!" Of course the rocket says USA.
Our 2AM adventures at the mall.
We went to catch The Lone Ranger last night at Tropicana City Mall. I thought the movie was incredible and a true breath of fresh air. The actors portrayed their roles well and the plot was as original as Hollywood can get I suppose. I’m not going to spoil the movie with a review; all I’ll say is that it is a movie well worth watching.
Mantra, pt 1
Today is a good day.
morning rambles; part 2
It’s the oddest times of the morning,
The minute between wake and sleep,
When the hot water touches my cold bare skin in the morning,
Or lean over the counter waiting for the water to boil,
When I comb my hair,
That I think of you and realize how much I am able to feel.
My bed is holding me captive
Good morning. I refuse to be sad but it feels like I’m caught under a rug and choking on the dust.
Only 16 more hours. I can do this.
So I made a journal in hopes I will keep sane for the next few months until I sort my life out. I was always a stickler for the old fashioned; if it was old-school journaling, you shan’t bastardize the means of expression by whoring your mind in the form of blogging at the same time. However, as Bob Dylan’s hit single chants repetitively in my noggin’, ye times are a’changing! I decided to (attempt) thought-vomitting in both my journal and my blog due to the inconvenience of time and space (dang you Stephen Hawking!).
As for now? I’m sitting in the library, waiting for my class to start. The weather was beautiful this morning. As I walked to college, the slight warmth of the air contrasted the somber expression of the sky.
… And I need to run to the bookstore to print out something.